The Memoir Of ~ sZeYi~

What's on my mind??

2010-04-05T23:27:00.006+08:00

Been having lots of disturbing images and voices in my head lately...especially when I am fatigue, laying on my bed and getting all ready to sleep...

Yet, the disturbing scenes kept running on my mind, kept me awake and distressed.

Even if I am asleep, my dreams seem disturbing as well....First few nights is all about people dying...It happen even during a short nap...then it slowly tune down but it still seems to be solemn and gravely...and most of the time I was waken up by these dreams...

At first I suspected it was due to the stress on finishing up my FYP draft...

Then it came to this ridiculuos or some might said superstitious thoughts...Is '清明节' (qingming festival)....

Slowly I realised that it always started with a scene I heard in one of my class...on how this 'people' would got beaten up if they had request on their clients...then it leads to more and more violence and disturbing images that I had forgotten ages ago...it all seems to be coming back to me now...

Wonder what would happen if I had watched The Clockwork Orange?? or any of such genre movies?? Would I go insane??

Enough already with whats in my mind, yet today in class, lecturer highlighted those creepy, horrifying cum voilent movies...thanks god I never heard of any of those before...but she goes on with describing briefly on those scenes in the movie...Oh God~~

What worst was when she told the class about how people in the rural area kill their newborn...OH MY GOD~~

That might be one of the last thing people would want to hear about...

I am more worry about my sleeping issue now...Will people die of exhaustion like this?? Hope not but its really troubling me...

"Haiz".

我的情感.....

2010-03-21T10:47:00.020+08:00

最近发现自己情绪有点低落。

无论再上课, 吃还是玩乐...感觉还是很空虚 ,心情总是闷闷不乐的。

连对自己最爱吃的芝士也无感觉了。

在这星期六天, 情绪好像有好转。虽然整理房间有点累, 但是再累汗中我还是感觉到心旷神怡。

度过了一个忙碌的周六, 身体都累极了。

闹钟的响声都将我从酣睡中惊醒了, 令我悲从中来。

挣扎了一段时间, 终于说服了自己, 对自己说, "今天想要松弛的心情. 化悲痛为力量, FYP一定会有进展的!"。

可惜, 为了那一点点的小事情都闹气了。留下了车子和她, 而带走了一肚子的气和眼泪。

我选择一个人挨饿。

明知道这只是个愚蠢的 固执, 但还是冲动的做了这个错误。

看来我又加多了一条疤痕在我们的感情上。

对不住, 再一次伤害了妳和我的心。

对不住, 我达不到你对我的期望。

情绪再一次减弱了, 沮丧又一次回到我身边..............

Just For You, Dad.....

2009-06-21T22:45:00.017+08:00

Daddy,

I understand that men show their love in a different way from women. You may not mention it often, but I always know how much you care & love for me.

I never forget the hardship you gone through to bring me up and become who I am today.

You provide me with education I need. Thank you dad!!
You give me the freedom to choose my own life. Thank you dad!!
You trust me with the bottom of your heart without a single doubt. Thank you dad!!
You work so hard to fulfill all my needs and wants. I could say that I'd been taken care well by you. Thank you dad!!

Besides, I always remembered how you would spare your time every year to take my report cards and fetch me to school or tuition or clinic when I was sick. In addition, I would also always remembered the incident where you had to rush back from KL just to send me to tuition. On top that, I also remembered how you spent so much to buy me the Chinese medication during the trip at Hong Kong and we ended up controlling our scarce finances.

Thank you for everything you had done for me. I may not said this often or I had never said this before, but I would really like to take this special day to tell you how much you mean to me.

THANK YOU SO MUCH DAD!!! I LOVE YOU!!!

Daddy, you are my everything and my world too.....

This is my dad, my world....
DAD, YOU ARE THE BEST!!!

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!!

p/s : To all fathers, Happy Father's Day!!!

Happy Birthday Mum!!!

2009-06-06T00:04:00.035+08:00

Just wanna wish ya

'HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!'

May your life filled with love & joy always...

Love you ~muacks~

On the 6th of June 2009, we celebrated my mummy's birthday at Ah Keat Seafood, Raja Uda. Below are some pictures of the event......

These are some the dishes we ordered

The finished dishes

Mummy's birthday cake

Daddy, Mummy & her cake

Candle lighted

Untied the ribbon

Cake cutting ceremony

Mummy & Grandpa

Mummy & I

p/s : Thanks grandma for giving birth to this wonderful woman. Love you too....

Mother's Day Pre-celebration

2009-05-10T01:02:00.006+08:00

On Saturday night (9th May), we had a Mother's Day celebration with the ice-cream cake - by sis & me - together with Grandpa and also Uncle Jason & family.....

Mother's Day Ice-cream Cake

Well, this is a short celebration. We will be having another dinner on Sunday night...

Hopefully there are more to write about and more pictures to be posted....

Mummy with her cake

The 2 mothers with baby Jun

My family & baby Jun

p/s: Sis, I know your heart was here with us..... :P

Just For You, MUM...

2009-05-08T23:19:00.028+08:00

Mummy,

If I have never thanked you for bringing me to this world, I would like to thank you now.

If I have never thanked you for bringing me up, I would like to thank you now.

If I have never thanked you for being proud of every little things I'd achieved, I would like to thank you now. I would also like to tell you that I am proud to have you as my MUM!!!

If I have never thanked you for enduring all my bad attitudes and behaviors, I would like to thank you now. I know I had took you for granted - knowing that you will always be there for me, knowing that you will always showered me with your unconditional love, knowing that you will accept & love me for who I am. I had always been throwing my tantrums on you. I know I had promise you that I will changed but I always failed. Believe me, this time I'll try harder.

If I have never thanked you for showering your love and care on me, I would like to thank you now. Thank you for being there with me when I was sick. Every time I was sicked, you will be there by my side taking care of me. You never thought of yourself - never thought of how tired you would be or how you may be infected. The only feelings exist were worry and pain. I never forget the worried and hurt feelings reflected in your eyes when I got food poisoning in Korea and Kenny said that if my vomiting continues, the only thing he could do was to send me to the hospital. At that time, you were there by my side all the time -missing all the activities and fun.

I am sorry that I had never showed my gratitude for everything you have done for me. I know it is not right to acknowledge and show my gratitude to you only during Mother's Day but I would still like to take this opportunity to thank you.

THANK YOU SO MUCH MUM!!! I LOVE YOU!!!

As you know, I am not an expressive person (except for expressing my anger). However, I would try to express my gratitude towards you more often.

Mummy, to the world you might be just a person, but to me you are the world......

This is my mum, my world...
YOU'RE THE BEST, MUM!!!

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!

Here is an e-present just for you

(Pink carnation as a sign of my gratitude)

"The love that a mother devoted to her child was the greatest love of all...."

p/s : To all mothers, Happy Mother's Day!!!

- Just For Laugh -

2009-03-31T22:29:00.002+08:00

There is this story about Ah Beng I would like to share.

Ah Beng bought a new phone.
He sent a message to everyone from his phone book and said,
"My Mobile number has changed.
Earlier it was Nokia 3310. Now it is 6610"

*ROFL*

Prada Oh Prada

2008-12-25T23:34:00.004+08:00

Bout a week ago, I had accepted my friend request in babysitting his pet, Prada while he is on a holiday trip. Well, I was a bit reluctant at first thinking back on how my three little hamsters (Active, Lazy Pig & Big Eater) died one by one. I was worried that the same destiny will fall on Prada if it was placed under my care.

Prada is a five months old, male hamster.

This is PRADA

Looking at his body -big and round- you would know that he is one LAZY BUM. He only moves around when he needs food and when my family & I called him (we need to call him a couple of times before he would start moving and respond to us). Other than that, he would just spend his time sleeping. You should have see how excited my mum was yesterday when she saw Prada playing with his exercise wheel for the first time.

Today around 8pm while I was in the kitchen preparing dinner, I heard my mum talking to Prada. After a few minutes, I heard my mum shouting that Prada may be dead. He was not responding to my mum even after my mum tried calling him for a couple of minutes. He was not even moving. I quickly ran out to have a looked at Prada while my mind was telling me -"Oh no! All hamsters under your care have the same destiny. What have you done to your friend's pet? How are you suppose to break the news to your friend?".

My mum even tried waking it up by shaking it's cage but Prada was still lying dead. Then my dad said that he was certified dead as it's eyes did not opened.

OMG....What have I done? It was only the 4th day and he was gone?

Suddenly, Prada woke up and started responding to our call.

OMGzzz....Prada was SO SO SO LAZY that he was actually sleeping and ignoring all of us, giving each and everyone of us a heart attack....

This is PRADA - sleeping.

PRADA - awake.

And the secret to wake him up and being able to catch all this cute pictures is.........

Providing him food.
That's why my mum's finger is seen in this pic.

p/s: Dear Active, Lazy Pig & Big Eater, Merry Christmas. May you all rest in peace.

Merry X'mas '08

2008-12-25T01:13:00.005+08:00

24 Dec '08

Christmas has always been one of a very special event in my life. All the beautiful lighting, decorations and celebrations had always make me feel happy and at times - magical.

I think one of the reason why I love Christmas is the very same reason why I love CNY - it brings everyone together. It had always seems to me that this very special day should be celebrated with lots of friends and family. That's how I celebrated it every year with my family.

Today , the dark sky was filled with bright stars and the night was accompanied by the cold breeze. It makes a wonderful Christmas eve.

Although this year (once again without fail) I had celebrated the eve together with my parents, uncle and relatives, it seems different.Although I do enjoy the BBQ dinner we had together but I still feel that there are something missing.I dont know why but somehow deep in me was buried the feeling of.............Loneliness & Sadness.

Perhaps it is because we had all departed before the clock strike 12. Perhaps it is because I wasn't looking forward for the coming of year 2009. Perhaps and perhaps and perhaps I dont even know the reason why. My emotion is once again playing a trick on me.

Anyway, I would love to take this opportunity to wish everyone, especially those who love me & whom I love dearly........

MERRY CHRISTMAS 2008!!!!
*muacks*

p/s: Merry Christmas grandma.

A Great Start

2008-11-02T02:39:00.000+08:00

Hey everyone…I now proudly announce that I have officially launched my blog with this very first post of mine. Yippie!! I have finally been able to scribble out something to be posted here after 7 months (this blog was commenced since March 2008 :p). Sorry for those whom I have promised earlier to start blogging about some interesting episodes of my life. Therefore the first few posts would be the updates of my past affairs.

There are lots of reason why people blog. I heard that some people blog because they want to keep in touch with others and some just feel like expressing themselves while others wants to improve their language. Well, the main reason I blog is because I would like to jot down all the chapters of my life and be able to laugh or cry about when I read it in the future. In addition, I would also love to improve my English through writing (as for the time being, pls do bear with my language :P).

So if you are interested in knowing a slice or two of my life, then stay tuned for more…Haha…